If like most you are offended by any of the big 3 topics... religion... politics... sex... then this is an accidental web re-direction... sorry. For the rest we are using skills handout #1 and are bored...
Today the Twits agreed religion has no place in political debate and sent thousands of tweets decrying the attention. Purple is the rage on The Facebook... it's a Hail Caesar kind of thing... the debates were on on ethnicity... so lots of hurt feelings...
Today we are going to demonstrate the Top 5. A Top 5 is an effective way to create community and comedy all in the same swipe... when you add a political campaign the barbs can be vicious... don't moan... be groan... I will start at the bottom and troll upwards...
Top 5 signs no one has heard of you
# 5 Your mom calls you Fred and it's Dave
# 4 A photo of you is used to fill out police line ups
# 3 You grew a beard and your wife didn't notice
# 2 Your kids call you "the help"
And the #1 sign no one has heard of you... Canada Immigration wants to see your papers and dental records...
Top 5 Puns for Lord4Mayor
# 5 Time for the Hail Mary
# 4 Parting the waters since "92
# 3 Powered by Angel...donors...
# 2 Policies from the scripture of Job...
And the # 1 Pun for Lord4Mayor...
Have faith ye of little!
Top 5 non tunnel policy suggestions for Bob4Mayor
# 5 Promise to balance the books using moon-dust
# 4 A Green campaign needs the green so... Pony Up!
# 3 Applying to be the mayor who christens... sorry... opens the Piece by Piece Bridge
# 2 Highlight the knowledge gained during years on Council to successfully locate the new tree park in such a way as to take advantage of the fertilizer...
And the # 1 non tunnel policy suggestions for Bob4Mayor...
Find a hole to climb in and if it is big enough... build a tunnel!
Top 5 Difference between Oscar4Mayor and Wayne4Mayor
# 5 One lived in poverty... the other lived it
# 4 One worships a higher power... one thinks he is a higher power...
# 3 One was a successful CEO... one watches the OC...
# 2 One has a war-chest... one warns of chests
And the # 1 difference between Oscar4Mayor and Wayne4Mayor...
One has a fat chance... the other a slim chance...
Top 5 Nemshi4Mayor highlights
# 5 People have stopped calling him Bob
# 4 Better understanding of police response times
# 3 A devoted and colour coordinated social network
# 2 Loved season 1 of the Big Bang Theory
And the # 1 Nemshi4Mayor highlight...
Good attendance marks!
Top 5 insights gained by Ric4Mayor from his Council experience
# 5 When in doubt on a vote... Potty!
# 4 Watching the last Council helped me understand the value of money... and how to hide it...
# 3 No...
# 2 I know the difference between a '67 Chardonnay and a '48 Pinot Noir...
And the #1 insight gained by Ric4Mayor from his previous Council experience...
If it's up to me to lose... I will...
Top 5 Signs Barb4Mayor needed to fire someone
# 5 Stress balls broke
# 4 High heels were killing her from sprinting from event to event...
# 3 No one answered when she asked "who's in charge?"
# 2 Mercury was in retrograde
And the # 1 reason Barb4Mayor had to fire someone...
Sometimes actions speak louder than forums
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment