Tuesday, August 30, 2011
The Top 40, 40th Birthday gifts from the Alberta PC Party
# 40- Schools without teachers
# 39- The privatization of AGT… Telus where the money went
# 38- Leaving public life for lobbying… Alberta version of “Who wants to be a
Millionaire?”
# 37- The rise of the Homeless Industry… if you build it… they will come!
# 36- Perfecting the Shoot, Shovel & Shut up crisis management model… what’s your beef?
# 35- Going all in with VLT gambling…#1 AB revenue generator…bet you can’t pay the rent.
# 34- Ralph Bucks, Dead Ducks and MLA’s personal Paving Trucks
#- 33- Pacific Western Airlines providing a safe landing for PC funds, friends and flacks
# 32- Diversify diversify that’s the plan…if we can’t do it MagCan.
#31- Nomination meetings that require candidates to put their money where their democracy is
# 30- Recognition by PC Leaders of the role Dinosaur farts play in contributing to Global Warming
#29 – Giving away industry leader Novatels patents for a song or ringtone #applelovesABPC’s
#28- No one will hazard a guess at how much it cost to give away the Swan Hills waste plant
#27 – Annual Health Care overhauls but no overhaul of the golden parachutes given to executives
#26 – The (non Timmies) double dip in the Government trough because 1 paycheque is never enough
#25 – All (ring) roads lead to lawyers fees and consulting bees
#24 – Cutting Kindergarten to improve the future for Alberta, children 6th on list of importance after asphalt
#23 – Heritage Savings Trust Fund because you can’t break open the piggy bank if you don’t have 1
#22- Why own Alberta Energy, paid for by Albertans, when PC’s could get almost $.10 on the dollar in real money for the assets?
#21- PC’s privatize liquor sales and the loss of revenue is enough to make a person drink
#20- PC’s replace massive pensions with even larger one time payouts #canyousaywindfall
#19- Surplus hospitals reduced to rubble, dissenting MLA’s banished for causing trouble
#18- Bill 19, the Land Assembly Project Area Act, giving property owners the right to remain silent
#17- Bill 36…seven land use regions under direct control of PC cabinet #doIgetakiss1st? #40isenough
#16- Family Day… a time to spend with family not in jail #lookattheshinydiamond
#15- Energy deregulation… bringing Albertans energy prices of tomorrow… today
#14- Paying off the debt early… similar to buying a house without budgeting for maintenance and taking a mortgage out for repairs
#13- PC’s giving themselves 30% pay raise during a recession… hey we need consumers too
#12- The collapse of the Principle group under unprincipled regulations and regulators
#11- An AB health “Super Board”… everything is better with “super” in it
#10- The PC Bums and Creeps attitude towards Canadians creating the Alberta Advantage
#9- Money and tax exemptions for the Flames and Oilers…hockey is on Maslow’s hierarchy after food
#8- Royalty roulette nothing says “Hello Saskatchewan” to the oil industry like instability
#7- Picking fights with Dr.s…Albertans love to visit a Dr. with a grudge
#6- Large class sizes…the gift that keeps on giving
#5- Billions for unneeded upgraded power capacity…someone is watching Tim the Toolman Taylor #morepower
#4- Changing “Alberta Advantage” slogan 2 “Freedom to Create” or as printers call it GOLD! #let’schangetheletterheadagain
#3- Petty feuds between Edmonton and Calgary… why can’t we all just live in Red Deer?
#2- Forestry managed by “close the barn door after horses are gone” technique #butpinebeetlesaresosmall
And #1 PC 40th Birthday gift to Albertans…
The Food Bank… not just for the upper crust anymore…
Saturday, April 2, 2011
May Day!
Top 5 reasons to have another early election
# 5 Elected officials want to get it over before cottage season
# 4 Take the minds off hockey for Calgary, Edmonton, Ottawa and Toronto
# 3 Creates a new drinking game for Universities as they drink every time “coalition” is mentioned
# 2 The anger over money spent on an unnecessary election will keep us warm
# 1 Frozen Canadians have missed Elizabeth May talking about global warming
NDP leader Jack Layton was in Edmonton during Earth Hour which is how he spun the dimming prospects for the NDP in the province.
Liberal Leader Michael Ignatieff is excited to participate in his 1st election saying the leaves on the trees in Harvard are especially striking in June.
Conservative Leader Stephen Harper was denied an opportunity to perform at the Juno awards on Saturday. Officials refused to give the Liberal, NDP and Bloc Quebecois a chance to sing a response saying it would take too long. A spokesman for the oppositions groups denied this would be a problem saying they would save time by singing from the same songbook.
The CBC has embraced a new tool, Vote Compass, which has people filling out a survey to determine who will win. So far the clear leader is Justin Beaver followed by Drake and Nikki Payne.
I’m not sure why the opposition parties are so upset with the Conservatives building more prisons. At some point all of the Ministers getting convicted have to be housed somewhere.
Jack Layton spent time in Quebec to condemn the oil sands tax breaks and the results were fantastic. Next up Layton will tour BC and complain about Toronto getting all the movies, Saskatchewan to complain Toronto gets all the tax breaks and Toronto to chastise the rest of Canada for hating Toronto.
In an attempt to connect with the younger voters all of the Parties are fully engaged in Social Media with Twitter accounts, Facebook pages and YouTube videos of them puking up a JaggeBomb. The candidates all have Facebook profiles with each of the parties trying hard to get people on Facebook to poke them. Asked to comment former PM Jean Chretien was confused saying Canadians were mad when he poked voters.
I asked the Wit and Writing for Women (www.cheersproject.com) comedy group to suggest Twitter names for the candidates. Here are some of the best:
Stephen Harper @sweatervest, @grumpypants, @dictator-in-waiting
Michael Ignatieff @homeinengland @smartiepants @packingjustincase
Jack Layton @pickmepickme @justafleshwound @Iheartcoalitions
Elizabeth May @chickenlittle @badmenwon’tplaywithme @1millionpeopleloveme
Gilles Duceppe @whereismypension @canadasuckswhereismypension @let’sseperatewhereismypension
I hope the leaders of the other parties who don’t have an elected member in Parliament don’t sue me for leaving them out of the jokes!
# 5 Elected officials want to get it over before cottage season
# 4 Take the minds off hockey for Calgary, Edmonton, Ottawa and Toronto
# 3 Creates a new drinking game for Universities as they drink every time “coalition” is mentioned
# 2 The anger over money spent on an unnecessary election will keep us warm
# 1 Frozen Canadians have missed Elizabeth May talking about global warming
NDP leader Jack Layton was in Edmonton during Earth Hour which is how he spun the dimming prospects for the NDP in the province.
Liberal Leader Michael Ignatieff is excited to participate in his 1st election saying the leaves on the trees in Harvard are especially striking in June.
Conservative Leader Stephen Harper was denied an opportunity to perform at the Juno awards on Saturday. Officials refused to give the Liberal, NDP and Bloc Quebecois a chance to sing a response saying it would take too long. A spokesman for the oppositions groups denied this would be a problem saying they would save time by singing from the same songbook.
The CBC has embraced a new tool, Vote Compass, which has people filling out a survey to determine who will win. So far the clear leader is Justin Beaver followed by Drake and Nikki Payne.
I’m not sure why the opposition parties are so upset with the Conservatives building more prisons. At some point all of the Ministers getting convicted have to be housed somewhere.
Jack Layton spent time in Quebec to condemn the oil sands tax breaks and the results were fantastic. Next up Layton will tour BC and complain about Toronto getting all the movies, Saskatchewan to complain Toronto gets all the tax breaks and Toronto to chastise the rest of Canada for hating Toronto.
In an attempt to connect with the younger voters all of the Parties are fully engaged in Social Media with Twitter accounts, Facebook pages and YouTube videos of them puking up a JaggeBomb. The candidates all have Facebook profiles with each of the parties trying hard to get people on Facebook to poke them. Asked to comment former PM Jean Chretien was confused saying Canadians were mad when he poked voters.
I asked the Wit and Writing for Women (www.cheersproject.com) comedy group to suggest Twitter names for the candidates. Here are some of the best:
Stephen Harper @sweatervest, @grumpypants, @dictator-in-waiting
Michael Ignatieff @homeinengland @smartiepants @packingjustincase
Jack Layton @pickmepickme @justafleshwound @Iheartcoalitions
Elizabeth May @chickenlittle @badmenwon’tplaywithme @1millionpeopleloveme
Gilles Duceppe @whereismypension @canadasuckswhereismypension @let’sseperatewhereismypension
I hope the leaders of the other parties who don’t have an elected member in Parliament don’t sue me for leaving them out of the jokes!
Tuesday, October 12, 2010
LFCCMCCUJ Volume 18
The relative merits and policies of each of the candidates for mayor need scrutiny, debate and intelligent parsing. This is not going to be the place to do it... sorry. For the rest of us we are using skills handout #1 and are bored...
Incongruity is skill # 11 on your handout and really seems out of place. In a political campaign you the unpaid comic use incongruity to highlight the statements a campaign makes with a little used skill... reality. Every campaign tries to put their candidate in the best possible light... it's the name of the game... as a comic your task is to use this to form the basis of jokes. Usually incongruity becomes apparent on the hustings when a candidate offers it up on a platter... the family values guy who is caught with hookers... Mr. Law and order charged with trafficking drugs or the anti-gay reformer suddenly saving money by sharing a hotel with his same sex aide. Calgary has had some moments of incongruity from their candidates but sadly we will have to go by the candidates track record... or lack thereof...
Ric4Mayor has 9 years as an Alderman, voted against the budget 9 times, was unable to get the support of Council members to back him and promoted himself as Dr. No. The incongruity is that he had chances to make a difference and show fiscal restraint without success... fortune cookie anyone? During the campaign he revealed the 7 non elected members who have already agreed to form a coalition with him while promoting his ability to get consensus. As a comic this may seem easy but dig deeper...
Setup: With the race for Mayor beginning to slip away Ric4Mayor is highlighting his experience and warning voters of the perils of electing someone with less credentials.
Punchline Incongruity: With his vast experience and cost cutting credentials Calgary is looking at a potential tax increase of 9% and about a billion in poorly tendered contracts and questionable purchases.
Barb4Mayor is a study in how incongruity can sometimes work in the candidates favour. Since she refuses to gift comics with a scandal we have to go by her past and find the incongruity. In her role as a news anchor and community spokesperson Barb4Mayor gained a reputation as a really nice person, friendly and willing to roll up her sleeves to help out a cause. Boring! Her incongruity is while all the other candidates have talked tough she is the only one who has fired a manager for not performing. The obvious incongruity has already been used by her.
Setup: Candidates are calling Barb4Mayor naive and too inexperienced to perform the job of Mayor.
Punchline Incongruity: Reacting to the shots Barb4Mayor released a critique of their websites highlighting the typos and then fired her tax adviser for trying to claim deductions on schedule 1 of the tax form that clearly were better served under her private company.
Nenshi4Mayor: By running on a platform of undisputed intelligence and a promise to fix a broken Council Nenshi4Mayor claims all ideas as his own and when another candidate has a similar idea he cries plagiarism. If the idea is different he their obvious lack of intelligence. It plays well to the kids and makes incongruity really easy.
Setup: Reacting to a policy statement from his opponent Nemsi4Mayor called the ideas that he agreed with brilliant while slamming the naivete of those that didn't.
Punchline Incongruity: For someone with such an extensive book knowledge of human relations Nemsi4Mayor failed the part on how cooperation requires you sometime use the inside voice.
The race has less than a week remaining... for the sake of all comics lets hope someone serves up a belated turkey.
Incongruity is skill # 11 on your handout and really seems out of place. In a political campaign you the unpaid comic use incongruity to highlight the statements a campaign makes with a little used skill... reality. Every campaign tries to put their candidate in the best possible light... it's the name of the game... as a comic your task is to use this to form the basis of jokes. Usually incongruity becomes apparent on the hustings when a candidate offers it up on a platter... the family values guy who is caught with hookers... Mr. Law and order charged with trafficking drugs or the anti-gay reformer suddenly saving money by sharing a hotel with his same sex aide. Calgary has had some moments of incongruity from their candidates but sadly we will have to go by the candidates track record... or lack thereof...
Ric4Mayor has 9 years as an Alderman, voted against the budget 9 times, was unable to get the support of Council members to back him and promoted himself as Dr. No. The incongruity is that he had chances to make a difference and show fiscal restraint without success... fortune cookie anyone? During the campaign he revealed the 7 non elected members who have already agreed to form a coalition with him while promoting his ability to get consensus. As a comic this may seem easy but dig deeper...
Setup: With the race for Mayor beginning to slip away Ric4Mayor is highlighting his experience and warning voters of the perils of electing someone with less credentials.
Punchline Incongruity: With his vast experience and cost cutting credentials Calgary is looking at a potential tax increase of 9% and about a billion in poorly tendered contracts and questionable purchases.
Barb4Mayor is a study in how incongruity can sometimes work in the candidates favour. Since she refuses to gift comics with a scandal we have to go by her past and find the incongruity. In her role as a news anchor and community spokesperson Barb4Mayor gained a reputation as a really nice person, friendly and willing to roll up her sleeves to help out a cause. Boring! Her incongruity is while all the other candidates have talked tough she is the only one who has fired a manager for not performing. The obvious incongruity has already been used by her.
Setup: Candidates are calling Barb4Mayor naive and too inexperienced to perform the job of Mayor.
Punchline Incongruity: Reacting to the shots Barb4Mayor released a critique of their websites highlighting the typos and then fired her tax adviser for trying to claim deductions on schedule 1 of the tax form that clearly were better served under her private company.
Nenshi4Mayor: By running on a platform of undisputed intelligence and a promise to fix a broken Council Nenshi4Mayor claims all ideas as his own and when another candidate has a similar idea he cries plagiarism. If the idea is different he their obvious lack of intelligence. It plays well to the kids and makes incongruity really easy.
Setup: Reacting to a policy statement from his opponent Nemsi4Mayor called the ideas that he agreed with brilliant while slamming the naivete of those that didn't.
Punchline Incongruity: For someone with such an extensive book knowledge of human relations Nemsi4Mayor failed the part on how cooperation requires you sometime use the inside voice.
The race has less than a week remaining... for the sake of all comics lets hope someone serves up a belated turkey.
Friday, October 8, 2010
LFCCMCCUJ Volume 17
Courtesy, civility, campaign. Which of these things are not like the other? A comic who is not paid by a candidate can use joke to mock, highlight or reveal an aspect of the campaign that followers and casual observers miss. A really good joke hits where it hurts, usually in your pocketbook and credibility...
Should you decide as a comic to make jokes during a campaign the experience is different from every other place of comedy. 1st you will be hated. This is not a pleasant experience but part of the game. If your joke is funny or insightful you will be attacked by those trying to get their candidate elected. In being a comic all of the candidates are fair game... so the only people who won't attack you are those who don't vote. Not really your audience.
Selecting who get most of your comic attention depends on you as a person and the race as it unfolds. If there is a candidate who is far ahead of the pack your jokes might be the only opposition they will get. And they will attack you for being hopelessly out of touch with reality. If your comic attention is evenly distributed... well see above.
The most vocal attacks will be from campaigns that invoke an evangelical or populist movement. If the base is fired up... your jokes will put you in the firing line. When everyone is thinking the same... no one is thinking at all... a campaign filled with signs... slogans and colour schemes will defend their candidate with a vengeance. Patience, time will validate your jokes because an election won on a Bieber like fever usually comes back to haunt. Yes we can...
In the US Stephen Colbert is hated by the Republicans because he openly parodies their policies. Nothing says funny like repeating the words of a rabid base. Jon Stewart gets attacked from Republicans for openly mocking them. Glen Beck gets attacked by Democrats for vilifying them. I know Beck isn't considered a comic. Technically he is a fool because he is paid by the Republicans...but man his stuff is hysterical.
Being a comic in an election is like going to a Flames game in your Toronto Maple Leaf jersey. You had better be prepared for the wingnuts showing off for their peeps.
As a comic you will be subjected to criticism of your ability from people who have never been on stage, written a joke or been able to make someone laugh in person. They are called a campaign team. If your joke is effective their defense will be to claim "It isn't funny" to try and downplay the truth behind the joke. In politics it is all about how you spin it.
I can't give you any magic bullet to ward off the attacks. You will feel the slings and arrows despite your cause. I would like to give you some advise. As a comic you are regularly using words in a way that is more advanced than your attackers. The temptation to unleash a barrage of insults, ridicule and barbs can be almost impossible to resist. Here's the advise... take the high road. Say thank you to every insult and slight no matter how personal. Then go on. It isn't fair to bring a machine gun to a pop gun fight and it shows a real lack of maturity. Sticks and stones can break your bones but names can maim ya...
Just trying to be comic in an election sets you apart from most people... to use your skill in attacking those less prepared... is just plain bullying. If you can't take a person calling you an asshole because of one of the jokes you delivered... you really shouldn't be in the comedy profession...try being a City manager... they never get questioned.
Should you decide as a comic to make jokes during a campaign the experience is different from every other place of comedy. 1st you will be hated. This is not a pleasant experience but part of the game. If your joke is funny or insightful you will be attacked by those trying to get their candidate elected. In being a comic all of the candidates are fair game... so the only people who won't attack you are those who don't vote. Not really your audience.
Selecting who get most of your comic attention depends on you as a person and the race as it unfolds. If there is a candidate who is far ahead of the pack your jokes might be the only opposition they will get. And they will attack you for being hopelessly out of touch with reality. If your comic attention is evenly distributed... well see above.
The most vocal attacks will be from campaigns that invoke an evangelical or populist movement. If the base is fired up... your jokes will put you in the firing line. When everyone is thinking the same... no one is thinking at all... a campaign filled with signs... slogans and colour schemes will defend their candidate with a vengeance. Patience, time will validate your jokes because an election won on a Bieber like fever usually comes back to haunt. Yes we can...
In the US Stephen Colbert is hated by the Republicans because he openly parodies their policies. Nothing says funny like repeating the words of a rabid base. Jon Stewart gets attacked from Republicans for openly mocking them. Glen Beck gets attacked by Democrats for vilifying them. I know Beck isn't considered a comic. Technically he is a fool because he is paid by the Republicans...but man his stuff is hysterical.
Being a comic in an election is like going to a Flames game in your Toronto Maple Leaf jersey. You had better be prepared for the wingnuts showing off for their peeps.
As a comic you will be subjected to criticism of your ability from people who have never been on stage, written a joke or been able to make someone laugh in person. They are called a campaign team. If your joke is effective their defense will be to claim "It isn't funny" to try and downplay the truth behind the joke. In politics it is all about how you spin it.
I can't give you any magic bullet to ward off the attacks. You will feel the slings and arrows despite your cause. I would like to give you some advise. As a comic you are regularly using words in a way that is more advanced than your attackers. The temptation to unleash a barrage of insults, ridicule and barbs can be almost impossible to resist. Here's the advise... take the high road. Say thank you to every insult and slight no matter how personal. Then go on. It isn't fair to bring a machine gun to a pop gun fight and it shows a real lack of maturity. Sticks and stones can break your bones but names can maim ya...
Just trying to be comic in an election sets you apart from most people... to use your skill in attacking those less prepared... is just plain bullying. If you can't take a person calling you an asshole because of one of the jokes you delivered... you really shouldn't be in the comedy profession...try being a City manager... they never get questioned.
Thursday, October 7, 2010
LFCCMCCUJ Volume 16
It has been a while... and the fun of it all sometimes causes me to lose focus. Sorry. The lesson is for the Wit and Writing for Women group and if you are coming to the site expecting a reasoned look at a campaign... again sorry. For the rest we are using skills handout #1 and are bored...
Irony is a subtle skill and is helped if you have led a life that showed so much promise and ended in the shitter. Ironically I am really good at irony.
A fisherman eaten by a fish... ironic
A comic telling a joke he laughs at and no one else does...ironic and pathetic...
etc...
A candidate becomes an ironic figure... to you the comic... when you can find a funny or touching way to mirror the message the candidates campaign is sending out... tax cutter... family values... really really big brain... with things like tax evasion convictions... multiple wives and butlers... really really starstruck fans...
Start by using a direct statement from the campaign...
Ric4Mayor believes in cutting waste...
Barb4Mayor believes in community involvement...
Nemshi4Mayor believes the previous Council was broken...
Bob4Mayor believes in LRT...
To be ironic it needs fact... so be prepared to wade through a lot of chaff...
Now apply the skill of irony to the statement. This could be a statement they made... or a happening or cartoon you have established earlier. The irony of irony is that it is a joke... set up and punchline...
Irony is used by a comic to wake up the audience... in psychokinetic terms the realization of words that they the audience agrees with... being said by you the comic... activates production of endorphins... the slight felt hearing the punchline releases testosterone... hence the term "fighting words"... but I digress...
Think of an ironic observation as a jolt to wake up your audience... not so much Red Bull as Red BS.
Send me your ironic observations with the 4 candidates using the set up lines provided above and we will discuss them in the next meet up. I would give you mine but ironically it turns out I am not funny.
Irony is a subtle skill and is helped if you have led a life that showed so much promise and ended in the shitter. Ironically I am really good at irony.
A fisherman eaten by a fish... ironic
A comic telling a joke he laughs at and no one else does...ironic and pathetic...
etc...
A candidate becomes an ironic figure... to you the comic... when you can find a funny or touching way to mirror the message the candidates campaign is sending out... tax cutter... family values... really really big brain... with things like tax evasion convictions... multiple wives and butlers... really really starstruck fans...
Start by using a direct statement from the campaign...
Ric4Mayor believes in cutting waste...
Barb4Mayor believes in community involvement...
Nemshi4Mayor believes the previous Council was broken...
Bob4Mayor believes in LRT...
To be ironic it needs fact... so be prepared to wade through a lot of chaff...
Now apply the skill of irony to the statement. This could be a statement they made... or a happening or cartoon you have established earlier. The irony of irony is that it is a joke... set up and punchline...
Irony is used by a comic to wake up the audience... in psychokinetic terms the realization of words that they the audience agrees with... being said by you the comic... activates production of endorphins... the slight felt hearing the punchline releases testosterone... hence the term "fighting words"... but I digress...
Think of an ironic observation as a jolt to wake up your audience... not so much Red Bull as Red BS.
Send me your ironic observations with the 4 candidates using the set up lines provided above and we will discuss them in the next meet up. I would give you mine but ironically it turns out I am not funny.
Wednesday, October 6, 2010
LFCCMCCUJ Volume 15
Polls taken in my head show 80% of surfers and 99.9% of targeted hits go WTF? Sorry. To the rest we are using skills handout #1 and are bored...
As droned on earlier... a mayoral campaign is unique in Canadian politics. A mayor is not the head of a billion dollar corporation as some suggest... the fire department isn't expected to turn a profit... nor is sewers, roads... excepting of course the inevitable toll to be tacked on while taking Davey's Driveway to Bragg Creek... A City makes next to nothing on parks... police or parking... sorry parking rakes it in. A City is different from a company... a mayoral race is different from Canadian politics and a City is not a business. And yet... with really unique exceptions... we keep getting the same results. As a comic it is helpful to look at the position based solely on past winners... because nothing suceeds like excess...
A WTF is when you combine not only the comic skill but the event. Each of the skills in the handout do not stand alone and can be augmented with other skills or their nasty cousins. The same for each of the issues. For example...
Oscar4Mayor was originally a form of ridicule but if you add exaggeration and rhyme to his hilarious appearances at the Public debates he now has a cool theme song and more support than most...
The best WTFs are personal, close to the bone and have some grain of fact. I know it isn't much different than a line used for a public forum or TV debate... and unfortunately not near as funny as the live doorstep show.
As a comic your lack of job is to determine what is the defining trait of the candidates. When you see them on TV... in re-touched photo's... or in person outside your door begging you to Tweet for them... what can you lampoon? A comic WTF is like a gift... something the candidate does... becomes or says that can be attached to your cartoon.
Ric4Mayor started it... when he suggested that he had already sewn up the votes of Aldermen yet to be elected... a WTF of 9.2... I cheered... it plays beautifully into the earlier exaggeration of his close ties. Like most WTF's it is hard to top the actual event...
"Asked at a kindergarten on the importance of getting along Ric4Mayor surprised kids bu pulling out 7 aldermen from his pocket"
"When attacked over his ability to get along Ric4Mayor challenged the heckler to a team bonding meeting with his 7 aldermanic bestest friends... outside in a City shack..."
Barb4Mayor had an easy WTF as well. In fact it plays completely into the cartoon established. Everyone sees her as a nice person... other candidates are courtly and call her Miss... sweet. In comic terms a barb is not really nice... its a tool used by comics to make the person in the front row cry or pee themselves... when Barb4Mayor canned her manager for not performing it ruined my cartoon... I cartooned her as a really tough questioner who is going to ask all of City Hall for answers and information... and expect more than sound bites. So now my cartoon is closer to the perceived reality... bummer. On the bright side you can almost hear the sphincters tighten at City Hall every time she rises in the polls...
"If Barb4Mayor keeps firing people she is going to be untouchable"
"I know it says something different on my brochures... it is a misprint but I fired the printer, his paper supplier and the pizza delivery guy"
Nenshi4Mayor has given me many WTF moments... all of them in some way or other connect to his campaign and sound bites. As a history buff I love the use of purple... it is the royal colour... Caesar went for the purple because the position was that of a deity... and hey who doesn't want to be called "Your Worship"? I cartoon it as a Big Brain Theory campaign and I am secretly captivated by Sheldon running City Hall.
"I will put my experience, qualifications, intelligence, IQ, CV, resume, social network savvy and Level 12 1/2 Elf Abjuration D&D Mage status against anyone."
"I'm the best qualified how many times do I have to repeat myself?"
Bob4Mayor had his WTF with the Bridge to the airport. South West Calgary was given water treatment plants, roads LRT and faster access to Banff ski hills... the Inner City got Bridges, freeway festivals... why shouldn't the North East at least get a Tunnel? The excuse it makes no fiscal sense is odd... nothing the last few Councils did had a basis in fiscal sense... and no matter how much the other camps protest Bob4Mayor is a really nice guy...
"I can get the Tunnel built cheaper by contracting it out to be dug in Red Deer."
"The only way to pay for the tunnel is to put a tax on people using the airport which would put an unfair strain on aldermen who go on junkets, vacations and working vacations."
Wayne4Mayor is just lost in the drone... his biggest WTF was when he released his donor list...
"I challenge everyone to a game of Monopoly... I get to be the banker"
Lord4Mayor had a WTF moment on TV when some old guy asked him how he would counter the loser label. To his credit Lord turned the other cheek...
The rest are fighting the good fight... saying the right things or saying nothing at all. The WTF moment with them was when they paid the deposit...
As droned on earlier... a mayoral campaign is unique in Canadian politics. A mayor is not the head of a billion dollar corporation as some suggest... the fire department isn't expected to turn a profit... nor is sewers, roads... excepting of course the inevitable toll to be tacked on while taking Davey's Driveway to Bragg Creek... A City makes next to nothing on parks... police or parking... sorry parking rakes it in. A City is different from a company... a mayoral race is different from Canadian politics and a City is not a business. And yet... with really unique exceptions... we keep getting the same results. As a comic it is helpful to look at the position based solely on past winners... because nothing suceeds like excess...
A WTF is when you combine not only the comic skill but the event. Each of the skills in the handout do not stand alone and can be augmented with other skills or their nasty cousins. The same for each of the issues. For example...
Oscar4Mayor was originally a form of ridicule but if you add exaggeration and rhyme to his hilarious appearances at the Public debates he now has a cool theme song and more support than most...
The best WTFs are personal, close to the bone and have some grain of fact. I know it isn't much different than a line used for a public forum or TV debate... and unfortunately not near as funny as the live doorstep show.
As a comic your lack of job is to determine what is the defining trait of the candidates. When you see them on TV... in re-touched photo's... or in person outside your door begging you to Tweet for them... what can you lampoon? A comic WTF is like a gift... something the candidate does... becomes or says that can be attached to your cartoon.
Ric4Mayor started it... when he suggested that he had already sewn up the votes of Aldermen yet to be elected... a WTF of 9.2... I cheered... it plays beautifully into the earlier exaggeration of his close ties. Like most WTF's it is hard to top the actual event...
"Asked at a kindergarten on the importance of getting along Ric4Mayor surprised kids bu pulling out 7 aldermen from his pocket"
"When attacked over his ability to get along Ric4Mayor challenged the heckler to a team bonding meeting with his 7 aldermanic bestest friends... outside in a City shack..."
Barb4Mayor had an easy WTF as well. In fact it plays completely into the cartoon established. Everyone sees her as a nice person... other candidates are courtly and call her Miss... sweet. In comic terms a barb is not really nice... its a tool used by comics to make the person in the front row cry or pee themselves... when Barb4Mayor canned her manager for not performing it ruined my cartoon... I cartooned her as a really tough questioner who is going to ask all of City Hall for answers and information... and expect more than sound bites. So now my cartoon is closer to the perceived reality... bummer. On the bright side you can almost hear the sphincters tighten at City Hall every time she rises in the polls...
"If Barb4Mayor keeps firing people she is going to be untouchable"
"I know it says something different on my brochures... it is a misprint but I fired the printer, his paper supplier and the pizza delivery guy"
Nenshi4Mayor has given me many WTF moments... all of them in some way or other connect to his campaign and sound bites. As a history buff I love the use of purple... it is the royal colour... Caesar went for the purple because the position was that of a deity... and hey who doesn't want to be called "Your Worship"? I cartoon it as a Big Brain Theory campaign and I am secretly captivated by Sheldon running City Hall.
"I will put my experience, qualifications, intelligence, IQ, CV, resume, social network savvy and Level 12 1/2 Elf Abjuration D&D Mage status against anyone."
"I'm the best qualified how many times do I have to repeat myself?"
Bob4Mayor had his WTF with the Bridge to the airport. South West Calgary was given water treatment plants, roads LRT and faster access to Banff ski hills... the Inner City got Bridges, freeway festivals... why shouldn't the North East at least get a Tunnel? The excuse it makes no fiscal sense is odd... nothing the last few Councils did had a basis in fiscal sense... and no matter how much the other camps protest Bob4Mayor is a really nice guy...
"I can get the Tunnel built cheaper by contracting it out to be dug in Red Deer."
"The only way to pay for the tunnel is to put a tax on people using the airport which would put an unfair strain on aldermen who go on junkets, vacations and working vacations."
Wayne4Mayor is just lost in the drone... his biggest WTF was when he released his donor list...
"I challenge everyone to a game of Monopoly... I get to be the banker"
Lord4Mayor had a WTF moment on TV when some old guy asked him how he would counter the loser label. To his credit Lord turned the other cheek...
The rest are fighting the good fight... saying the right things or saying nothing at all. The WTF moment with them was when they paid the deposit...
Tuesday, October 5, 2010
LFCCMCCUJ Volume 14
Yes... it is spelt exactly as it sounds... if you wanted something meaningful... sorry... wrong URL... For the rest we are using skills handout #1 and are bored...
A segue is your go too line when all the balls have lined up... sorry to the Miss... Mrs... Ms agenda... a segue is funny...
The debate at the moment to me... cause I am on The Facebook and now tweet with the best...is about language. So far in my experience every mayoral candidate... me included... living or dead... me included... lies for a soundbite! It is the job! Well except for Ralph. When he told us what was really going on we laughed our ass off... kept going "Ralph is drunk again" sort of response... we forgave him the big shit...
A segue is a comic devise used to illicit a laugh from a hostile crowd... angry mob... or your campaign supporters. A segue can be really funny... but also become... and speaking of illicit how is your manager?... nasty...
The issue in YYC is accountability. As a comic your view should always be to the funny... unless you are a Fool... see Lesson 10 or 11... so what is making the candidate standout... besides not standing out then segue to an issue friendly barb... sorry wit...
"Yes I was in the majority on the Piece by Piece Bridge and speaking of majority... The polls are in we are ahead... so just keep the faith... pass the hat... and all will be well"
"Yes I am smart... academic...business friendly... colour coordinated and speaking of smart how about the idea of a gym? Who "works out?"
"Yes I was a YYC opinion maker shaping the views of YYC for a decade and this has connected me with the elite... and speaking of decades can you believe I have had the same purse 10 years?"
"Yes I want to kill the tunnel... and speaking of want... who wants ice cream?"
A segue is your go too line when all the balls have lined up... sorry to the Miss... Mrs... Ms agenda... a segue is funny...
The debate at the moment to me... cause I am on The Facebook and now tweet with the best...is about language. So far in my experience every mayoral candidate... me included... living or dead... me included... lies for a soundbite! It is the job! Well except for Ralph. When he told us what was really going on we laughed our ass off... kept going "Ralph is drunk again" sort of response... we forgave him the big shit...
A segue is a comic devise used to illicit a laugh from a hostile crowd... angry mob... or your campaign supporters. A segue can be really funny... but also become... and speaking of illicit how is your manager?... nasty...
The issue in YYC is accountability. As a comic your view should always be to the funny... unless you are a Fool... see Lesson 10 or 11... so what is making the candidate standout... besides not standing out then segue to an issue friendly barb... sorry wit...
"Yes I was in the majority on the Piece by Piece Bridge and speaking of majority... The polls are in we are ahead... so just keep the faith... pass the hat... and all will be well"
"Yes I am smart... academic...business friendly... colour coordinated and speaking of smart how about the idea of a gym? Who "works out?"
"Yes I was a YYC opinion maker shaping the views of YYC for a decade and this has connected me with the elite... and speaking of decades can you believe I have had the same purse 10 years?"
"Yes I want to kill the tunnel... and speaking of want... who wants ice cream?"
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